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Joke of the Day

"Do you have 11 protons? Because you are sodium fine :p"

"What do you give a losing horse with lockjaw? A new jaw-key"

"In my past life I was a turtle... It is all slowly coming back to me."

"Marriage is not a noun; it's a verb. Kinda like crying, screaming, or dying."

"English: i before e, except after c. Science: Ummmm, No."

"My lift to work was late to arrive at the train station, so I killed the driver... ...I thought it was fair but some said it was a loco-motive"

"If Apple has taught me anything, it's wait to see the ""Steve Jobs"" movie until they release a second version."

"Just got out of the shower and realized I forgot to wash my butthole. Oh well, there's always next Sunday."

"Reddit is like my ex. The biggest time waster ever."

"I learned all I need to know about how to treat my coworkers by watching every Saw movie at least ten times."