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Joke of the Day
"What Olympic event that involves throwing should be eliminated? Discuss"
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"Before mustaches were invented, people had to just GUESS who owned a water bed"
"Donald Trump, Hillary Clinton, and Bernie Sanders are on a plane. The plane crashes. Who survives? America"
"If you are making love to music, use live album cos you get a round of applause every 3 minutes."
"Some call it drug abuse. I say the drugs get what they deserve."
"People are always weirded out when I take notes during episodes of Dexter."
"I FEEL SO ALIVE MCDONALD'S IS GIVING AWAY FREE COFFEE I PASSED 20 MCDONALD'S TODAY DO THE MATH TOO LATE I DID THE MATH SLEEP IS FOR MORTALS"
"Why don't snakes like Vitamin C? Because it's an anti-hisstamine."
"Why can't a blonde dial 911? Because she can't find the eleven."
"Bear boss: I need to see you two in my office right away. *I see my coworker is nervous* Me: Relax, how bad can it be. Salmon: Shut. Up."