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Joke of the Day

"How is a Mac like a Queen's guard? They're both run by Unix."

"It's all shits and giggles... Until someone giggles and shits."

"Have you heard about the sequel to the Exorcist ? In the new version, a woman hires the Devil to get a priest out of her son."

"Like Captain Ahab, I have my own white whale. But I have no one else to blame, I'm the one who married her."

"Don't cry because it's over, smile because for a few miles they believed you were the real bus driver."

"I hate when I think of a great tweet and discover someone did it already. It's like that time I invented the wheelbarrow."

"I'm still not convinced Mitt Romney was born."

"Hate it when we run out of clean towels so I have to ride my white stallion Gregory up and down the driveway real fast to dry my mullet"

"HARRY JR: what do you see in the mirror of desire, papa HARRY SR: well if i look closely i see you mowing the lawn this morning like i asked"

"The Wind is a Force So when I pass gas i must be using the Force."