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Joke of the Day

"How many Vietnam vets does it take to screw in a lightbulb? HOW THE FUCK WOULD YOU KNOW? YOU WEREN'T THERE!!!!"

"""Male""-Sexual Don't worry, that doesn't mean I'm gay It just means, anything that comes in a mailbox... ...makes me want to cum in a mailbox."

"Kudos to Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie! They really went out of their way to make their adoptive African children feel like a part of an authentic American family by getting a divorce."

"Why did the scarecrow get a promotion? Because it was out standing in its field."

"Tell y'all what I know about dwarfs.. Very little."

"A cheap concert 50 CENT starring Nickleback"

"[Me and a friend have movie night, order pizza and do some acid] Me: ""Hell yeah"" Friend: ""Hell yeah"" Pizza: ""Oh hell yeah"""

"Went into a massage parlor & asked for the happy ending, now I'm tucked into bed with a Korean woman reading me Cinderella."

"I'm so patriotic I ejaculate red white and blue Minus the blue part. I should see a doctor."

"I met a geologist the other day He seemed gneiss."