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Joke of the Day
"Why did the scarecrow get a promotion? Because it was out standing in its field."
Next Joke
"I hate when people tell me to have a safe flight. Like I have a choice. It's either back home, or in a swamp. I'll try really hard to live."
"In middle school, I had a crush on a kid named BJ. When you write Heather loves BJ on your notebooks, you make a lot of friends."
"How to ruin a joke on Reddit? Misspell the paunch line."
"I found $80 in my jeans. The kid in me says ""Buy Nerf guns and candy"", but the adult in me says ""Buy vodka, Nerf guns and candy""."
"Crabs only walk that way when people are looking at them"
"I heard about a new drug that is super addictive and leaves one in a state of sustained indifference. Parents, talk to your children about Crystal Meh."
"I stick pins and needles in the people I don't like because can't afford voodoo dolls."
"""There's an all you can eat--"" CUT TO: My spinning empty office chair"
"What do you call an octopus that fights sharks? An octobrave. I'm sorry."