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Joke of the Day

"How does an elephant hide in the jungle? It paints its balls red and climbs up a cherry tree. What's the loudest noise in the jungle? A giraffe eating cherries."

"My friend got sent to prison for pulling out 3 people from a burning building Unfortunately, it turned out they were firefighters"

"What did one boob say to the other? You're my breast friend. Badum tits"

"I'll never sleep with a golfer again. The last one kept trying to use a wedge to get the ball in the hole."

"yes ladies i have a black belt. its a black leather belt from Marshalls. [i flinch as a bird flys by] you girls wanna get some lunch?"

"A man armed with lazer guns shot up a church... ...people went running pew after pew."

"My teeth are so white I could use them to help land a plane and still no boyfriend. I'm beginning to think TV ads lie."

"I used to date a girl with a lazy eye, I had to dump her because she kept seeing guys on the side."

"I'm always creeped out by the guy who seems to know the age of consent laws a little too well."

"Today my friend got a new downstairs neighbor. Herpes"