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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a hillbilly giraffe that lives in a trailer and drinks beer all day? A rednnnnnneeeeeeeccccccccckkkkkk."

"Why is USA so gloomy? Because only two parties exist for the whole country"

"The only thing standing between me and greatness, is millions of people who are more talented and want it more."

"Being asked to be best man is like being asked to make love to the queen. On the one hand it is a great honour, but you dread the moment when you have to rise to perform."

"When I die I want my body to be donated to science ...but more specifically, a scientist who is working on bringing dead guys back to life."

"What did the dead person say the skeleton... ""You're a numbskull."""

"Why didn't they just call the Selfie Stick a NarcissiStick?"

"Keanu Reeves, sure, but then Keanu comes back a rittle bit rater."

"What's the difference between batman and a black person? Batman can go to the store without robin'"

"On a bad dinner date? Bump the table with your knee to make the water in your glass ripple. Claim a T-Rex is coming. Sprint out the door."