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Joke of the Day

"Paying bills is fun and easy when you have a bottle of wine and a shredder."

"Which emoticon indicates the desire to cover someone with fire ants?"

"I told my wife she drew her eyebrows too high She told me she's tired of my repost BS and divorced me. It was definitely a surprise."

"There are 2 LOSERS who hang out at the same sidewalk corner everyday... The taller LOSER says to the other ""Hey man, have you seen my keys?"". The other LOSER replies, ""No, have you seen my wallet?""."

"I hate when people talk behind my back. They disscuss me."

"The kiss is a wordless articulation of desire whose object lies in the future, and somewhat to the south."

"Do you know why newspapers don't print the pictures of all criminals? They would run out of black ink"

"What's better than watching a woman wrestle? Seeing her box."

"Why is Batman undefeatable? Because he was coached by Liam Neeson."

"BREAKING: Pluto is once again a regular planet. ""It was always huge & full sized!"" said one dwarf planet scientist with a fake mustache."