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Joke of the Day
"There is a race between a skull and a small butt one's clearly ahead, the other's a little behind"
Next Joke
"Hillary and Bernie are on a boat Hillary and Bernie Sanders are on a boat. It's sinking. Who survives? America survives"
"Chuck Norris' erections hum."
"I love you all so much right now because alcohol."
"How is the 85 year old Contractor that survived lung cancer doing? Asbestos he can. I'm so sorry."
"My problem with McDonalds is I can't go retrieve my kids in the play tubes because I can't fit in the play tubes because I eat at McDonalds."
"Chef 1: You can't serve cake for breakfast, moms won't allow it. Chef 2: What if we fry it in a pan & pour syrup all over it? 1: GENIUS!"
"My girlfriend is on her period... She calls me Dracula."
"A priest, a horse and a leprechaun walk into a bar. The bartender says, ""What is this, some kind of joke?"""
"*pays $20 for deluxe car wash* *hits roughly 3,287,998 bugs during 2 mile drive home*"