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Joke of the Day

"Today, I asked my husband if he would still love me if I was ugly and fat. He answered, ""Yes, honey I do."""

"Why can't you hear a pterodactyl use a urinal? Because the p is silent."

"Want his attention? Send nudes Want to piss him off? When he responds, reply ""Oops, wrong person"""

"Donald Trump Does this count as putting the punchline in the title?"

"Gravity Maxim Trow yourself from the building and catch from the boardwalk!"

"Forget ""once you go black you never go back"" I say ""For that special occasion go caucasian"""

"POLICE: knock knock DRUG DEALER: who's there P: weed DD: weed who P: we'd like to come in and arrest you DD: lol good one, come on in"

"Why did the pedophile get a job at the bakery? because he likes his buns fresh from the oven."

"Whats the difference between a chick pea and a garbanzo bean? I've never had a garbanzo bean on my face before"

"The guy who invented paper died last week That's tearable!"