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Joke of the Day

"Donald Trump Does this count as putting the punchline in the title?"

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"What do you call a fish without an eye? A Fsh"
"What does a racist baker exclaim? white flour!"
"Uber driver: ""I'm close, where are you?"" Me: ""oh I see you"" Uber Driver: ""Are you the guy in the middle of the road?"" Me: ""yeah floor it"""
"I guess you could call her a trophy wife. She's tattooed with the names of the previous winners."
"There's a man with two penises? That's nothing, I once knew a guy with FIVE penises... ...and his pants fit like a glove."
"I haven't eaten since last year, so why haven't I slimmed down?"
"Weird how people always die in groups of 3's... or 5's or 78's or however you group them cause there's lots of people & we all die."
"Putin takes over entire world while everybody searches for the missing plane."
"A lettuce, a tomato and a pumpkin had a race The pumpkin fell down squash. The tomato tried to ketchup, but the lettuce came out ahead"