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Joke of the Day

"Retailers have pulled all the Darth Vader toys from their shelves... Apparently they are a choking hazard."

"So my wife walked in on me blowdrying my crotch... And asked me what I was doing. ""Just warming up breakfast for you, honey."" First post, hope I'm doing this right."

"What did the math text book say to the Shakespeare text book? Look, buddy, I've already got a lot of problems, and I really don't need any of your drama."

"Why was the lazy-eyed man a horrible teacher? Because he couldn't control his pupils."

"A man who took an Airline company to court after his luggage went missing has lost his case."

"didja hear about the new LGBT libretto for Wagner's Der Ring des Nibelungen? The character Brunehilde is now named Brucehilde."

"How do you circumscize a redneck? By kicking his sister's jaw."

"What's a comedians least favorite drink? Booze"

"What's all pent-up and missing a cunt? Chelsea Manning."

"Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Nevermid, it's too long."