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Joke of the Day

"There is no bond greater than the mutual respect of two former high school friends who refuse to friend each other on Facebook."

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"Boss: ""Are you texting?"" Me: ""No, I'm Tweeting."" Boss: ""What's the difference?"" Me: ""Texting would imply that I have friends."""
"Why Don't feminists make good botanists? They spend the entire time in the greenhouses bitching about the glass ceiling."
"What do call groups of the 5 most dangerous animals? A troop of gorillas A shiver of sharks A streak of tigers A band of Indians And a gang of niggers."
"why do people romanticize the 1950s? like calm down, we still have milkshakes and racism"
"Just realized why women love shoes over clothing, because no matter how much weight they gain, the shoes still fit."
"I was in a porno once but I only had a small part"
"Don't get me started on trigonometry... I'll go on a tangent."
"What do you call a Jewish Pokemon Trainer? Ash."
"I'm an archaeologist... My life is in ruins."
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