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Joke of the Day

"I bet you one dollar I can touch your tit without touching your clothes fuck it, it's just one dollar"

"How many computer programmers does it take to change a lightbulb? None, that's a hardware issue."

"Jokes about women's menstruation aren't funny. Period."

"[texting] ME: I like you, I think you're cute MY CRUSH: oh um ME: HAHAHA omg my dog was chewing on my phone lol how did he type that"

"Why did the hipsters die of dehydration? They stayed away from the mainstream."

"what is a jew that has eaten too many beans? a gas chamber"

"When I worked at a pickle factory, I stuck my penis inside of a pickle slicer... They ended up firing both of us."

"*Skynet becomes self aware* *Starts a blog*"

"Just been sent to jail for the first time and spent the first half hour getting ass raped. My Uncle Frank takes Monopoly far too seriously"

"why are terrorists so popular at parties? Because They're the bomb"