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Joke of the Day

"[First date] Her: I'm really glad you asked me out yesterday in the park Me: *looking under table* you didn't bring your dog?"

"Why did the boy throw the butter out the window? to see the butterFLY!"

"Four gay men walk into a bar, there is only one stool left so what do they do? Flip it over"

"A friend of mine told me he gets terrible stage fright... ...I thought he was taking the piss but he really wasn't."

"Had sex while camping the other day.... It was fucking in tents....."

"What type of food do firefly's love to eat? Light food."

"My dick is good at math. What I'm trying to say is that it's the small things that count."

"Did you hear that Monica Lewinsky stopped smoking cigars? Now she's just bummimg cigarettes!"

"There is little hope for the person who becomes addicted to cold turkey."

"Before you insult somebody, walk a mile in their shoes Then, when you insult them you'll be a mile away and they'll have no shoes."