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Joke of the Day

"What is the fastest thing in the world? Milk. Because it's pasteurised before you see it."

"Wife asked me to get ""bath stuff"" for xmas. Hope she likes her toaster."

"Girl's idea of Valentine's Day. (???(?.? )? Guy's idea of Valentine's Day ( o )( o?(^?^?)"

"Why Hitler was late to work? He accidently didn't took the second left but the third Reich."

"my agent sent me a list of my followers & circled all crude avatars in red ink. if i dont block these people it WILL cost me the Arby's deal"

"My Facebook movie is okay, but the book was better."

"If you dress in cowboy clothes does that mean you're ranch dressing?"

"A radio said to the female radio... -Let's make some some baby radios! To which the female radio replied: -I can't, I am stereo"

"Are you feeling sluggish and tired? Constantly yawning throughout your day? There's a nap for that!"

"What's worse than being told by your doctor that you have gonorrhea? Being told by your dentist"