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Joke of the Day

"What do you call an Irish Jew? A leprechaun!"

"Thinking about becoming a cop just so I have an excuse for being out of shape, lazy and a racist."

"Remember how they drove in 90's TV sitcoms...the horribly fake steering wheel turning - left right left right? That's how I actually drive."

"Why did Jared go to a Goat farm? He heard there was lots of Kids there."

"Fog is like lingerie for the sky."

"""This place needs to be sticky, wall to wall."" -Every 2 year old with a Popsicle."

"Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because he got the gas bill."

"Why couldn't they save the shipwrecked hippies? They were too far out, man."

"What did the bra say to the hat? You go on ahead. I'll give these two a lift."

"What did Hugh Hefner say when he got to heaven? meh"