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Joke of the Day

"I never know what to do with my hands when I'm at a urinal besides flick the earlobes of the guy next to me."

"It's uncomfortable when the neighbor's kids look like you."

"I like my bread the way I like my women... French and covered in butter."

"A blind hooker tried to give me a BJ once she said I had the biggest penis ever. I said ""Ha, you're pulling my leg"""

"ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?!!! *holds up severed head The crowd stared in horror as the National Spelling Bee contest took a morbid twist."

"[woman on death row] ""Your last meal?"" - I don't care. You pick. ""Fish?"" - Gross no ""Steak?"" - No. Anything is fine tho. ""Pasta?"" - Ew carbs"

"Biggest joke on Reddit r/politics"

"Yo momma... Yo momma so stupid she wanted to buy tickets to watch xbox live."

"I like to yard work listening to Judas Priest... ......singing at the top of my lungs: RAKING THE LAWN RAKING THE LAWN!"

"Everyone want to change the WORLD, but no one thinks of changing THEMSELVES !!!"