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Joke of the Day

"I love people who don't take their sweet time pooping in a public bathroom. They take their shit seriously"

"I told my wife, ""no man should spend more time washing dishes than he does having sex!"" Our new dishwashing service is great."

"Want to hear a clean joke? Henry took a bath with bubbles. Want to hear a dirty joke? Bubbles was a man."

"Mom u can stop cutting the crust off my bread now im in a gang"

"How many people does it take to screw in a light bulb? How the hell did they get inside a light bulb?"

"I'm on a cruise this week. My humor didn't go over very well on the observation deck, nor did what I left behind on the poop deck."

"If someone says ""I will do anything for you"" lean in really close and say ""There's a body in my basement and I can't eat it all by myself."""

"What do you call an Ethiopian woman with a yeast infection? A quarter-pounder with cheese"

"When it's ""buy one, get one free,"" I have them put the free one in a separate bag so I don't get them mixed up."

"Today I saw a baby who had put on five stone in weight in two weeks by drinking elephant's milk. Whose baby was it? The elephant's!"