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Joke of the Day

"I planted some flowers, but they never grew. Should have seen it coming. The package did warn that they were pansies."

"Sex can burn 200 calories an hour. I better go on a diet."

"I have 2 eyes and can't see, but millions of eyes on me. What am I? NFL Referee"

"New York Sports"

"Do the followers in England read my tweets in an English accent? Because I write them in a Jamaican accent..so that must be weird..mon"

"What do women and the square root of 2 have in common? They're both irrational."

"Florida lawmaker Randall Thompson is forced to resign after it is revealed he spent taxpayer money on expensive footwear for his wife. I guess Randall mishandled his panhandle sandal scandal."

"What do call a girl that eats pastries while browsing the internet? Eclair."

"What is another way to describe a cat ? A heat seeking missile !"

"I saw a motorcycle with a broken windscreen And I thought ""that's not fairing too well."""