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Joke of the Day

"Vegans with children named 'Hunter' are why I lie awake at night."

"You know you're too drunk to drive when you swerve to miss a tree then realise it was your air freshener."

"I don't often tell sailor jokes But when I do they are usually salty."

"The fact that I have to debate evolution with people means it doesn't work quite as well as I'd like it to."

"What's the difference between a gay guy and a freezer? Freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out"

"She sent me a text saying she wearing something special for me... but every time I ask her what, she says ~ Nothing."

"My wife and I said we would only smoke after sex.... I have had the same pack of cigarettes since 2007, im starting to get worried about my wife though shes been going through 3 packs a day!"

"I LIKE THE WAY YOUR FLESH IS GATHERED ABOUT YOUR SKELETON - from pickup lines draft folder"

"Why is it so tough to please girls? They take classes on mass debating."

"I want to die like my grandfather, peacefully while asleep... And not like the 60 students on the bus he was driving."