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Joke of the Day

"Why are automatic vehicles difficult to drive? Because they don't come with a manual"

"My girlfriend decided to quit her job at the yogurt company The truth his, she never really liked the culture"

"A man is in the doctor's office: ""Doctor, can I get AIDS from sitting on a toilet seat?"" ""Well yes, but only if you sit down before the last guy gets up."""

"What's green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? a pool table."

"Why did the can crusher quit his job? Because it was soda-pressing"

"What do you call a midget clown that juggles? A Juggalo"

"I tried to fix my shovel today, but I just couldn't handle it."

"Is Pepsi ok? *I pull out my phone and send a text* *2 hours pass* *an out of breath Dikembe Mutumbo runs in wagging his finger* No it is not"

"An old drunk stumbles into a confessional. After not hearing anything for a while the Priest knocked on the wall. The drunk said forget it buddy there's no paper in here either."

"I was so excited when I saw the Nail Polish advertisement Because I want to sleep with this girl from Poland"