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Joke of the Day

"If it's 1 or 1000 sins you're still getting sent to Hell. So why not go for 1,000,000 sins and come down here a legend"

"and now for my next trick, i will saw a women in half. for this i need a volunteer. how about...MY EX WIFE SANDRA WOW I DIDN'T SEE YOU THERE"

"""Computers will never replace humans."" - Cannibal wisdom."

"I looked at the calendar and thought, ""It's been one of those days today."""

"What's the difference between a chestnut and a walnut? Your aim."

"My girlfriend is amazing, she is a Chinese food chef So shes very Lo Mein-tenance"

"What's worse than finding out that your wife has cancer? Finding out it's curable."

"Still in love with various hypothetical women."

"Paddy was rushed to hospital after he became slightly ill at the boxing gym It was only belly ache, but he tried to swallow the medicine ball."

"What is Stephen Hawking's favorite snack? His left shoulder"