215893

Joke of the Day

"I think I want a job cleaning mirrors... ...it's just something I can see myself doing."

"I always set my alarm to 9:11 So I *never forget* to *wake up*."

"What does a perverted frog say? Rubbit"

"Why is it unjust to blame taxi drivers for cheating us? We call them to take us in. (From The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Handbook of Conundrums, by Edith B. Ordway. So this is a century old joke.)"

"[campfire] And that's when he realized... HE FORGOT TO ENABLE WIFI AND WATCHED 5 SEASONS USING HIS DATA PLAN [everyone screams in terror]"

"Hear about the new gay sitcom? ""Leave it, it's Beaver."" "

"Customer: There's something wrong with my hot dogs. Waiter: Sorry I'm a waiter not a veterinarian."

"Why is the ocean so salty? Because the land never waves back."

"A poet and a logician were found dead earlier this week. They say the killer had no rhyme or reason."

"*wakes up the guy next to me* wow theres a sleepy boy here on this plane haha. Im on business myself. tryin to see if iceland is made of ice"