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Joke of the Day

"To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office Just know that I will find you. You have my Word."

"It's green but when you press a button it turns red. A frog in a blender."

"What equine likes to cut in line? A sawhorse!"

"-i am going to hell for this ""That's a sexy little outfit you're wearing,"" I said. ""I bet you want my cock in you."" ""Dave,"" my wife said, ""do you know I can hear you on the baby monitor?"""

"Why do proctologists like Facebook? It's another chance to look up old friends."

"How do you catch a unique rabbit? Unique up on him. How do you catch a tame unique rabbit? Tame thing.... You unique up on him too."

"My boss was all, ""Do you know why I called you to the office, "" and I was like, ""I dunno is there a hidden security camera in the bathroom."""

"Programming ""Knock, knock."" ""Who's there?"" very long pause.... ""Java."" :)"

"Why is star wars the most disgusting movie? Because its the most grossing."