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Joke of the Day

"Two elephants were standing in the shower. One elephant said to the other ""pass the soap"" the other elephant said ""there's no soap radio"""

"Did you hear about the overly-eager bread dough? In the morning he was always the first one to rise. He didn't want to be a loaf."

"texting and driving is dangerous because u might accidentally text the lips emoji to your boss"

"What is good on pizza, but not good on pussy? The cheese and crust."

"Thousands of years ago, cats were worshiped as gods. Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this."

"It's true what they say about the cast of the new ghostbusters film. They truly have no dick."

"Some choices are easier than others: An emergency doctor's appt vs a much needed hair appt. At least if I die my hair will be cute."

"""Is this seat Taken?"" - Guy who confuses Liam Neeson movies with a chair."

"If I ever run into Captian Crunch, I'm gonna punch him in the roof of his mouth."

"When someone is calling with your girlfriend... Take the phone and say: What has little balls, and hangs down? A bat. What has big balls, and hangs up? ...Then hang up the phone x)"