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Joke of the Day

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Austen ! Austen who ? Austen-tentatiously well off !"

"How do you use a philosophy degree in a professional context? *Why* would you like fries with that?"

"Why don't the Cubans have Olympic swimmers? Because they make it here."

"If I ever wanted to kill myself... climbing up your ego and jumping down to your IQ level would get the job done."

"What is cold, grey, and ugly? Me after I take all the Nyquil and die. Also, Janet Reno."

"A man was asked if he was Indecisive He couldn't make up his mind."

"I went to an art contest recently... It ended in a draw."

"Football players, basketball players and soccer players all play with balls. How come my girlfriend refuses to."

"With all the talk of gender lately I realized the fastest way to turn a pussy into a dick Give it a gun and a badge"

"What's the most redundant sentence you can come up with? -department of redundancy department"