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Joke of the Day

"There is nothing worse than running out of toilet paper and having to ask the guy in the next stall to wipe you."

"My girlfriend just admitted she used to be a Christian, so I broke up with her. It might seem judgemental, but I have only known her since she was Christine."

"What's brown and furry on the inside and clear on the outside? King Kong in clingfilm"

"How do you keep a blonde in suspense? ..."

"Question: what's Erdogan's favorite puzzle game? Answer: pseudo-coup (say it out loud)"

"What do you have when there's balls on your chest? Chestnuts What do you have when there's balls on your chin? A dick in your mouth."

"News just in. There are reports that all the toilets have been stolen at Scotland Yard. Police say they have nothing to go on."

"What does the Pope use to dry his hands? Papal towels."

"Where do Chicago football fans buy engagement rings? De Beers"

"You know as soon as my ""Swear Jar"" gets full, I'm going to use the money to get a Fking Puppy!!!"