214922

Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between jam and marmalade? You can't marmalade your dick in someone's ass."

"Why would someone in jail want to catch the measles? So he could break out."

"You can't run through a campground... you can only ran, because it's past tents."

"Change is hard So don't throw coins."

"Why did the blonde burn her ear? The phone rang while she was ironing!"

"Have you heard the one about the successful black man? Neither have I! I hope this isn't a repost. I made this joke, but I wouldn't be surprised if somebody else thought of it before me."

"I just hit my snooze button so much it's probably pregnant."

"Fifty Shades of Grey was disappointing. All those blindfolds and not a single person swung at a pinata."

"General Contractor: Don't worry ma'am, everything will be ready, we'll have the scaffolding set up and erected. Me: *mutes phone* hahahahaha"

"I went to buy a 'Where's Wally?' book today but couldn't find one anywhere. Well played, Wally. Well played."