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Joke of the Day

"Where do fleas go to surf? To the microwave."

"How much do you weigh after eating Chinese food? Wonton"

"hey magic 8 ball, why cant humans fly ""thats not a yes or no question"" then how did you just say that ""Yes"" no come on ju- ""Ask Again Later"""

"What is a pirate's favorite letter? ""R?"" ""Aye, ye would think so but 'tis the C he loves!"""

"What is the best part about raping a midget? Their arms are too short to hold you back."

"Alfred Nobel is considered the inventor of dynamite ...because all the others could not be positively identified."

"How do you fit an elephant in the subway? (x-post) You take the 'S' out of sub, and the 'F' out of way."

"Why did Microsoft go straight to Windows 10 and skip 9? Because Windows 8 9."

"[interrupts co-worker] actually I don't feel like talking to you"

"I am against picketing, but I don't know how to show it Happy Birthday man, we miss you"