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Joke of the Day

"*picks up bug, puts it outside* There ya go. *later, bug smashes thru door carrying gun* You should have killed me when you had the chance"

"What's the difference between acne and a priest? Acne waits for a boy to be 14 before it comes on his face"

"Finding Nemo (2003) A father is criticized for being overprotective after his wife & kids are murdered & his only surviving son is kidnapped"

"I was looking for a subtle way to describe my penis... ...and then I went to /r/minimalism..."

"What's even worse than five dead babies in a dustbin? One dead baby in five dustbins."

"Break up by making swimming motion arms every time they want to hold hands."

"What's the best thing to come out of a penis? The wrinkles."

"What do you do when your wife starts smoking? Slow down and apply lube"

"A Blonde is driving in her car and turns on the radio. It says that 2 Brazilian men were killed. She starts crying and says, ""How many is a Brazilian?"""

"What do you call a fear of horned bovines? Aurochnophobia."