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Joke of the Day
"A man goes to the zoo, As he walks around he see's only one animal, a dog. It's a schitzu"
Next Joke
"Flight attendant: ""will you perform exit row duties in the event of an emergency?"" Me: ""yes"" In my head: ""No we're all gonna die"""
"What is grey and comes in quarts? an elephant."
"What do you call a 5 year old kid with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor All they wanted was books but instead they got magazines"
"If circumcisions take an hour to complete, how long will you have to work to complete 12? Around the cock"
"What do you call your friend Splee at a soiree? A PARTY SPLUNGE!"
"Need tips on making something look like an accident."
"What do you get when you mix a helicopter and a rhino? Hell if I know."
"""You, the horse you rode in on AND the horses mother!"" ""What about the horses father?"" ""I already mentioned YOU once!"""
"Irony My friend was trying to explain to me that I don't understand the concept of irony... which is ironic because we were standing at a bus stop."