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Joke of the Day

"A baby seal walks into a club. ...while two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. Bah-dum-tsssssss."

"Y'all tweet like you don't know it only takes 2 doctors to commit you."

"What is Superman's comedy sketch show called? Essen-El"

"My stainless steel scissor rusted How ironic."

"Do you like tapes and CDs? Cuz I'm gonna tape my dick to your forehead, so you can see deez nuts."

"I love 12 year old porn. If you ask me, 2003 was just the golden age of porn with the best and sexiest adult actors of our generation."

"Short rabbi joke As I'm walking with a rabi I ask him, Me: so do you charge a lot for you circumcisions? Rabbi: no I just keep the tips"

"I'll lean at a 45 degree angle if I'm so inclined."

"Did you know there are more planes in the ocean.. Than submarines in the sky?"

"Have you guys seen the Petrified Forrest? Those trees are scared!"