213286

Joke of the Day

"I'd get my mind out of the gutter, but I think it's wrong to remove an animal from its natural habitat."

"I'm allergic to football fields They send me into NFLactic shock."

"Baby sister told me this one attn Harry Potter fans Sister: ""Harry's godfathers middle name should be 'Lee'"" Me:""wait, whose the godfather?"" Sister: ""Sirius Black"" Took me a minute."

"Not to brag but I can still fit in my culturally-defined gender roles from high school!"

"""And thou shalt know those whom God has chosen for eternal salvation in the following manner: they shall retweet this."" Revelation 4:12."

"How long did it take for the police to catch the man running in his underwear? It was a brief chase..."

"I saw a dramatic comedy about a guy with PbA. The plot was confusing... I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.."

"A man tells his doctor, ""Doc, help me. I'm addicted to Twitter! The doctor replies, ""Sorry, I don't follow you..."

"What do you feed a fat vampire? One stake should be enough"

"What's the best part about having sex with a gilf? You can finger her and grab her titties with one hand at the same time. ;)"