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Joke of the Day

"Remember ""pantsing"" people in high school... sneaking up behind one of your bros and slipping an extra pair of pants on over his pants"

"So I married way too young... Oops, she spells it Wei Tu Yung"

"What is the sun's favourite kind of food? Sol food"

"Why doesn't Usain Bolt have a girlfriend? Because he's literally the fastest man on earth (get it cuz sex)"

"I hired a hitman to kill the wife. He said, I'll shoot her just below the left nipple. I replied, I want her dead, Not fucking kneecapped"

"Ross's sister had a fear of wind instruments So Chandler played the drums. He didn't want to Harm Monica."

"What do you call a Mexican woman who has no legs? Cunts way low"

"England and Ethiopia recently played each other in a football match After a tough match, with both opponents clashing, the scoreline ended in English 8 - Ethiopia Didn't"

"Michelle Obama gave a great speech last night I can't wait to hear it again at the next Republican National Convention."

"I have just became a proud father! :) My son's actually just turned 4, but he was an annoying little cunt for the first 3 years."