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Joke of the Day

"How do you view lesbian relationships? 1080p"

"Whats the difference between a Pimple and a Catholic Priest? One will wait until you're 13 to come all over your face."

"SATs Roses are red, Violets are blue. I copied your answers, and I failed too."

"I always carry a picture of my wife and kids in my wallet. It reminds me of why there is no f*cking money in there."

"What's the difference between light and hard? I can sleep with a light on."

"Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not? People like me have to go to work and don't have time for all that."

"This damn button keeps popping off my keyboard... I swear I am about to lose fucking Ctrl."

"Father, i want a bicycle... Why you need that? You already have a wheelchair."

"Why did the chicken go to the bathroom? That's where all the cocks hang out."

"Dorothy: We have to see the wonderful Wizard of Oz Toto: OK but I wouldn't make a song and dance about it Dorothy: [inhaling] Toto: FFS"