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Joke of the Day
"How does Hillary Clinton clean her glasses? By deleting the mainframe."
Next Joke
"What's a holocaust survivor's favorite movie? Gone With The Wind."
"Conjugating verbs is great It's always in-tense"
"oh the aliens aren't speaking to us right now because idk they're pissed that we flaked out on that pyramid project they started or whatever"
"If history is written by the victors Then who wrote the history of France ?"
"Lick the corner of your mouth. The corner. JUST the CORNER. God damn it Diane do you want to be America's Next Top Model or the Hamburglar"
"Me: Wake up son! Son: Just 30 more minutes please Me: I'm borrowing your phone Son jumps of the bed: I'm awake!"
"""You are what you eat""? I don't remember eating a giant disappointment."
"True love doesn't care about the look or size of your wallet, it's all about what is inside ..... the wallet."
"16 sodium atoms walk into a bar... Followed by BATMAN!"