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Joke of the Day

"I am going to the Antique Roadshow. Gonna slap my tampon on the table and ask them what period it's from."

"I once made an apathetic club. No one cared enough to attend the meetings, though."

"What kind of money do polar bears use ? Ice lolly !"

"Boss: you spend a lot of time on your phone! Me: you spend too much time watching me. Don't you have work to do?"

"So my lesbian neighbours asked me what I wanted for my birthday... They got me a Rolex. I guess they misunderstood when I said ""I wanna watch""."

"If sex with 3 people is a threesome and sex with 2 people is a twosome, now I understand why they call you handsome."

"When Conor McGregor finishes in 13 seconds, everybody cheers But when I finish in 13 seconds, my girlfriend won't talk to me"

"That awkward moment when you're about to hug someone sexy as hell and then you hit the mirror."

"What do you call the sweat between two rednecks having sex? Relative humidity!"

"Its World Malaria Day on 25th April. But what do you get the mosquito that has everything?"