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Joke of the Day

"I told my Dad I was voting for Bernie Sanders... He responded, ""So you want to see America be destroyed?"" I said, ""No, I want to watch it Bern."""

"(NSFW) What did the haddock get covered in at the fish orgy? SALMONal fluid"

"My girlfriend told me to go out and get something that makes her look sexy... ...so I went out and got drunk."

"Why can't you play cards on a small boat? Because someone is always sitting on the deck."

"What was Charles Dickens' favourite experimental pop album? It was the best of Grimes..."

"I am not a racist but... I am not a racist but you have to agree that Little Cesars' Five dollar piazza is a good buy."

"What do you call a spanish child molester? A pedrophile"

"Follow your dreams Except for that one where you're naked at work."

"What's the only type of music that the balloon dislikes? Pop."

"A QA Tester walks into a bar."