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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a horse dick and a joke? You can't take a joke."

"HEALTHY VIRGIN Q: What's the definition of a healthy virgin? A: ""One who has never been bed-ridden!"""

"How do chinese people laugh over the internet? Lmao Zedong"

"Like arguing with a forest fire."

"When people are trending on twitter, I know that they died or said something racist."

"4yo: When you're 9, you can drive Me: Pretty sure you have to be older 4yo: Some people can drive at 9 Me: A little older 4yo: Ya, it's 9"

"the 80 year old lady paying w/ exact change and coupons behind me in line is pissed bc the credit card chip reader is taking too long"

"Q: How many British navy Officers does it take to change a light bulb? A: Only one but it takes him seven weeks to get there."

"ER Doc: you know you could have avoided these 3rd degree burns by walking away from the explosion at regular speed Me: did it look cool tho"

"No matter how often I scream METALLICA in the poolside DJ's face I don't think he's going to play them. Here come the police they'll help me"