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Joke of the Day

"Captain America: I got the alert, what's the emergency? Avengers: Well, it's snowing, so... CA [handing over shield]: Last time! Buy a sled!"

"Nine out of ten people enjoy gangbangs ...But I only have group sex when it's consensual."

"What do you call a black person that flys an airplane? A pilot you racist bastard"

"Me: *sneezes* Mom: Remember February 17, 2009 when I told you to bring a jacket?"

"This one came to me this morning - How do you spot a necrophiliac at a funeral? Mourning wood."

"[META] Can we have S,M,L flairs on joke posts to indicate length? Sort of similar to /r/tifu"

"I deleted all my german friends on my contant list on my phone... Now its Hans free."

"Why did Davy Crockett always wear a coonskin cap? It was a birthday present from his wife!"

"I used to date a girl with a lazy eye, I had to dump her because she kept seeing guys on the side."

"I'm Japanese. I took my Viagra this morning. .. Now I'm ready for erection day."