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Joke of the Day

"I deleted all my german friends on my contant list on my phone... Now its Hans free."

"Anytime I fly over the exact spot a time zone changes, I yell ""88 MILES PER HOUR!!!!"""

"What did the drunk say when his boss enquired about his availability? Yeah, I'm av**ale**able."

"All these idiots at the gym obviously don't know that it takes more muscles to frown."

"Q: Why did the kid dump a bucket of water off the school roof? A: He wanted to make a big splash in front of his class."

"A good friend doesn't just make you smile, they make you happy."

"You should argue with your wife only when she's not around."

"""He's more scared of you than you are of him"" - Girl coaching her friend into talking to me"

"Have you heard my unemployment joke? Yeah, it needs a little work."

"Q: What's the difference between a jeweler and a jailer? A: One sells watches and the other watches cells."