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Joke of the Day

"People call my Grandfather Spiderman... He doesn't have superpowers, he just finds it difficult getting out of the bath."

"A haunted house would be pretty scary if it was filled with light switches that accidentally turned on the garbage disposal."

"A pencil walks into a bar The bartender says, ""We don't serve your type here."" The pencil yells back ""Erasist!"""

"Remember that time Hitler had a juice cleanse?"

"What do you call Shaka Zulu with a Fire Cracker? BOOM-SHAKA-LAKA!"

"In a public restroom I found a sign that read ""THINK"" on the mirror above the sink so I labelled the soap dispenser ""THOAP"" to match with it"

"[dj voice] ""Make some noise, Dad Party!"" *dads go nuts* ""Whatcha wanna hear, I'm taking requests"" [in unison] HI TAKING REQUESTS I'M DAD"

"Having a dirty mind is okay, but having a clean heart is much more important."

"When choosing a heart medicine, always pick the one that causes, ""significantly less bleeding."" Less bleeding is good for not being dead."

"What do you call a sentinel with three hands? A watchman."