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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a bitchy midget who can get to places quickly? A shortcunt."
Next Joke
"Do you ever just look at a girl and instantly know she posts her daily horoscope on Facebook and quotes Marilyn Monroe?"
"*runs into restaurant* IS ANYONE HERE A DOCTOR? ""I'm a doctor"" Nice. Nice. Can you buy me dinner I'm very poor"
"The Tortoise and the Hare is a classic story about how people who like to run are awful."
"I went into a hotel.. I went into a hotel when a luggage boy came and said ""I'm the 'beg'gar"""
"According to the police, public masturbation is not considered a ""street performance"". Even if you have a hat on the ground on front of you."
"What do you call a black hitchhiker? Stranded."
"I really love sarcasm. It's like punching people in the face but with words."
"Did you hear about the crowd of Catholic priests at baby Gap? The sign in the window advertised ""Little Boys Pants Half Off!"""
"He died doing what he loved -- screaming for help and punching a bear."