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Joke of the Day
"Some people say i'm conflicted... I'm not so sure."
Next Joke
"What is brown and sticky? ..........A Stick"
"Is this your resume? ""Yep"" It just says you used to leave shit at your friends' doors, ring the bell & run away ""Oh yes"" Welcome to UPS!"
"I try to do my job the way I have sex. Work fast and and get done quick"
"mugger: GIMME UR MONEY ""All I have is this $5 grandma gave me on my birthday"" [mugger pulls off mask revealing grandma] IT'S PAYBACK TIME"
"I think my vibrator has Parkinson's."
"Why does Donald Trump watch the olympics? To see how high the mexican pole jumpers can jump."
"What do you call meat on the back of a cow? Aspergers"
"The most stressful part of my day is when my 5 year old shows me what he made in Arts & Crafts and I have to guess what it is."
"What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs is both the same. Thought I would join the circlejerk."