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Joke of the Day

"*sits son down for the talk* You ready? ""Yeah"" Ok. When a man and a woman love each other- *pulls out Pokeball* -they throw this at a baby"

"Nick: Can you tell me the way to Bath? Rick: I use soap and water personally."

"What do they say for jokes about German sausages? They are the wurst."

"What does a baby computer call it's father? Data"

"What did the cop say to Boris Yosanavich after pulling him over for speeding? Quit Russian."

"Did you hear about the leper on the trampoline? He strained his leg. ^^^I'm ^^^sorry."

"My dog kept me awake all night. Dreadful diarrhoea. Don't think I cooked him properly."

"I don't' carelessly utter profanities like a commoner. I take my time and articulate them properly; after all I'm a fcuking gentleman."

"I shall plucketh thine eyes from ye skull and make kebobs but with bendy straws instead of skewers cuz those are dangerous"

"Man hospitalized with 6 plastic horses up his ass Doctors describe his condition as stable"