210095

Joke of the Day

"My lesbian neighbours asked me what I wanted for my birthday. They gave me a Rolex. I think they misunderstood when I said I wanna watch."

"If your wife says ""what would you do without me?"" ""Live happily ever after"" is NOT the correct answer. Brrrr it's cold in this doghouse :("

"What do you call a stay-at-home parent? Unemployed."

"What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A Lickalotofpuss."

"How did Bill and Hillary Clinton first meet? They were both dating the same girl in high school."

"Billy Joel was hospitalized last week. He had a heart attack ack ack ack ack ack. You oughtta know by now."

"(Dad joke) How much did is cost the pirate to get his ears pierced? A buck-an-ear."

"Man arrested on charges of being nice, quiet guy. ""I'm shocked, he always seemed like such a murderous asshole,"" said a neighbor."

"What happens when ducks fly upside down ? They quack up !"

"Attidude Redefined for love: I can always take care of my self... But still, i want the person who can prove to me that i can't..."