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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a penguin with a machine gun? Sir. [Groan worthy penguin jokes](https://allwrong.wordpress.com/2007/10/05/penguin-riddles/)"

"PERIOD! how can you tell the Romanian woman was on her period? she was wearing one sock"

"You know you're getting old when people say you look young..:)"

"A neutron walks into a bar. If you dont know how the rest goes im sorry you dont deserve to be on the internet."

"My girlfriend said I have crusty feet. I blame my socks."

"What do you call a clock you wear on your belt? A waist of time"

"A midget walks into a bar... The bar was set too low."

"I was going to photograph my food but then I ate it. I hope I don't get kicked off Instagram for that kind of behaviour."

"It's that pottery scene from Ghost except it's me standing behind the Subway sandwich artist helping him make my sandwich."

"I tried running once. But I kept spilling my beer."