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Joke of the Day

"Better living through chemistry Table of Elements: C = carbon Ho = holmium Co =cobalt La = lanthanum Te = tellurium CHoCoLaTe - Better living through chemistry!"

"I invented something to keep the inside of my car quiet. It fits right over her mouth."

"YES! The receipts at CVS are very long. We know, they know, everybody knows!"

"what do you call a grenade thrown into a french kitchen? linoleum blownapart"

"I've discovered the best way to punish 17, is to put on the same outfit as her, then follow her around all day yelling out ""TWINSIES!"""

"Me: You've got the same stupid duck face in every picture! Daffy: Erm... :|"

"A man goes to the library and asks for a book on suicide the librarian says, sorry it looks like the last person never brought it back."

"Why can't you purchase minerals by the gallon? They only come in quarts(z)"

"It's hard to stop being depressed Because gravity is always bringing me down."

"What did one bolt of cloth say to the other bolt of cloth after hurting its feelings? I'm sari."