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Joke of the Day

"Don't believe in aliens, huh? Explain how people in the 1800s got on top of those bicycles with the huge front wheels."

"Damn girl you must have been out in the sun all day. Because you appealin'"

"What is the difference between red wine and women I let the red wine breathe when I'm having sex with it."

"*makes third wish* Lastly, I want to be irresistible to women. [Transformed into really nice handbag] Dammit."

"The titanic is all like... ""I nominate all my passengers for the ice bucket challenge"""

"I hardly ever drink Only 2 times a year to be exact On my birthday, And when it's not my birthday"

"Lately I've found my job, building kitchen work surfaces, to be counter productive."

"How many women are necessary to change a lightbulb? One... but, what does it matter if she will ask a man to do it?!"

"Why are there no Walmarts in Syria? Because they're all targets"

"How many ears does Spock have? A right ear, a left ear, and the final front ear."